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A local organization, the B.L.O.B. is slated to purchase a nearby warehouse on this date. Concerned citizens should read up on the details of their purchase.
All throughout town, cheese has been hard to come by. Local dairies are incapable of meeting the public's demand for gouda, cheddar and mozzarella. If someone doesn't step in with a plan soon, several local pizza shops will go out of business!
Local children are reporting an increase in super powers. Authorities have solicited the help of the local library.
Any children manifesting strange abilities should report to the library immediately for a full list of fun and exciting books to read and activities to do that will help them develop into full-fledged superheroes!
Superheroes really are fantastic. Have you hi-fived your friendly neighborhood superhero today? If not, be sure to give him or her a big thumbs up and tell them how thankful you are for all the amazing feats he or she does on behalf of your community!
The internationally renowned organization known as B.L.O.B. has opened an office here in town. There's no immediate word as to their plans for our city.
When asked to comment, their representatives declined to be interviewed. They simply laughed a sinister laugh and hung up the phone. Stay tuned for more details.