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A local organization, the B.L.O.B. is slated to purchase a nearby warehouse on this date. Concerned citizens should read up on the details of their purchase.
Gray paint has gone missing all over the city. It's a bit of a mystery who is purchasing it. If you have any information, please contact your local library, the authorities, or a hardware store.
Robots really are fantastic. Have you hugged your friendly neighborhood robot today? If not, be sure to give him a squeeze and tell him how thankful you are for all the robotic goodness he brings to your daily life.
Local children are reporting an increase in boredom. Authorities have solicited the help of the local library.
Any bored children should report to the library immediately for a full list of fun and exciting books to read and activities to do!
The internationally renowned organization known as B.L.O.B. has opened an office here in town. There's no immediate word as to their plans for our city.
When asked to comment, their representatives declined to be interviewed. They simply laughed a sinister laugh and hung up the phone. Stay tuned for more details.